What's Missing

I miss people,

I miss their smiles and hearing them laugh,

I miss hugs and holding hands,

I miss connecting.

I miss men,

I miss men in t-shirts

folding their arms, leaning against stuff,

I miss flirting.

I miss traveling,

I miss hotel showers,

I miss playing UNO all night, while eating popcorn and laughing 

I miss my team.

I miss life.

Sunset

Sunset

Orange sky,

Cool breeze,

sand between my toes,

cold water,

rocks,

the sound of jet engines.

children laugh

dog barks

tall buildings

lights in the distance

seagull lands on the sea

suns getting low

Directionally Challenged

Directionally Challenged 

I have lived in a desert, on a mountain, near beaches and big cities

I have been a daughter, a mother, a friend and and a lover

I have worked in a dozen different industries, but still I haven't found where I belong.

I love living in the city, but long for the quiet

I love being a mom, but long for a different kind of adoration

I love my job, but long to be needed

One day I want to sleep, the next I want to drive away

I am a constant work in progress, and I'll never be completed.

I feel myself getting restless, waiting for the next great thing.

I just want to find my place in the world.

What If...

What if..

I could be in love like they write it in the movies...

I'd be in angst and flirting and standing in the rain and he would come find me, and he would find me and I would want to be found.

We'd be snuggled on a couch or in bed eating popcorn watching old movies debating the veracity of one like, It Happened One night or the Maltese Falcon.

I'd be passenger in car on a random drive to a farm to get real cream or a winery or an antique store to buy a typewriter that we would use to leave each other notes in random places around the house when we had to be apart.

We'd be dancing in the kitchen listening to our song, while hand washing dishes after a meal made from some veggies I grew in our garden and some meat he'd barbecue on the grill.

I'd be driving to the airport to pick him up because I couldn't wait one more minute to kiss him.

We'd be sitting on the lawn in front of a fire pit, drinking wine, while we tell each other stories of what our lives were like when we were young, while growing old together.

I'd be filled with the kindness, and giving and selflessness that I think I could be with another person.

We'd be happy.

What if...